So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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