Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
