Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
