even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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