I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
