My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
