the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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