i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Randomize
