I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
