Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
