i was born a porn star she said
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
