question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Green mimosas i think yes
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
