he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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