Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
