K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
