I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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