Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
