I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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