did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize