Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Im part way to drunk.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
