You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
