im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
