ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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