You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
