YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Less talking, more tequila
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
