But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
