Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Randomize
