we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I'm both gender and math confused
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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