Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
