Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
We're too hungover to prance.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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