Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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