Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
