I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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