So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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