38 yer olds are good kisserssss
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
