nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Apparently you make a good broom.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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