Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Randomize
