Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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