is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
