This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize
