She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
