they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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