It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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