Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
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