We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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