Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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