Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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