if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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