the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
...so i touched it.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I think people are normalizing furries
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
