Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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