Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
